{"id":1914,"date":"2019-03-04T13:32:17","date_gmt":"2019-03-04T13:32:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.coachmentoring.co.uk\/articles\/?p=1914"},"modified":"2019-05-08T15:01:29","modified_gmt":"2019-05-08T14:01:29","slug":"develop-male-mentors-for-female-mentees","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.coachmentoring.co.uk\/articles\/2019\/03\/develop-male-mentors-for-female-mentees\/","title":{"rendered":"Five ideas to develop male mentors for female mentees"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"MaleIn the first of our series of blogs for International Women\u2019s Day 2019<\/a>, here are some ideas to use in briefing male mentors to mentor in a female mentoring programme. Research shows there are pros and cons to using female and male mentors when mentoring your female talent. Some male mentors are just naturally brilliant when mentoring a woman. Others need a little more support to really blossom. Here are some ideas to support them:<\/p>\n

1. Encourage honesty in\u00a0male mentors<\/h2>\n

The sharing of career and life experiences and telling of stories is so key in successful developmental mentoring. This is strongest when the mentor is demonstrating their more human side, their humility and when things have really gone down the pan badly! Male mentors can find this tough. Admitting to the times in their life when they have messed up badly and really learned from it. However, this is the heart of building trust in a mentoring relationship and where the role-modelling element can be strongest.<\/p>\n

Encourage your mentors to be themselves and be honest about their experiences with their mentees.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

2. Using challenge appropriately<\/h2>\n

Encourage male mentors to use challenge but in a \u2018brave space\u2019 that is held by them to demonstrate empathy, genuine care and concern and \u2018unconditional positive regard\u2019.\u00a0Don\u2019t let them be afraid of their female mentees and keep an aloof position whilst mentoring. #MeToo has created a situation where some men are now quite nervous about building too intimate a rapport in a mentoring relationship. So creating a robust working relationship in a male mentor\/female mentee<\/em> partnership can sometimes be awkward.<\/p>\n

Often virtually mentoring can reduce some of the cues that can cause this anxiety and help the male mentor to feel more relaxed. This is not new knowledge. Hamilton and Scandura in 20021<\/sup> found that, the reduced level of social cues over electronic media may allow greater opportunities for women and minorities to interact with mentors relatively bias-free. They also acknowledged that women might feel more comfortable having a male mentor working virtually, as their interest will not be misinterpreted in a virtual relationship.<\/p>\n

A good mentor knows when to push their mentee outside their comfort zone into the learning zone. Sadly some male mentors \u2018overpush\u2019 and their mentees end up in the panic zone and end up cancelling their meetings or avoiding their mentors if they can!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

3. Park the power and the ego<\/h2>\n

Male mentors find it harder to remove the power imbalance in their relationship, than female mentors.\u00a0Unless you are dealing with a Queen Bee<\/a>\u00a0of course!<\/p>\n

Without having it pointed out to them, the mentor can have a tendency to:<\/p>\n